Last week, we told the story of the raku pottery vase – The Titans – and a time before the gods, which you can read here. But what of a time before Cronus and Rhea? This week we are firing up the trusty time machine once again to answer the question of what was before them.

Today’s vase story, Gaia’s Revenge, tells the tale of a plucky mother that came from chaos, to form and become the source of life and sustenance for our planet. But as nice as all that is, she was also married to a real pain in the butt, whose control issues caused her more pain than childbirth. She’d of course solve this problem, with a little help and she’d inspire a certain Bobbit in the the future.

Let’s be clear about one thing. Gaia was first. It was from her, that sprang her controlling, and unreasonable partner. She has her own day named after her, and he is indeed the butt of many jokes made even today. Gaia was the mother of Cronus, and regretfully the partner of Uranus.

Gaia came from Chaos, harnessing the best of their creative energy. The day came that a certain sexy sky god sprang from her and she was quite smitten. He was as beautiful as the night sky, because, he was in fact the night sky! How could she resist his expansive twinkles and flashes of light.

In a moment inspired by the beauty of Uranus, she had a brilliant idea! That instead of her just creating on her own, that maybe a collaboration was in order. And so it was that she was able to convince Uranus to have children with her. Their new relationship energy brought much bliss – and children. It was during this time that she gave birth to the Giants, the Titans, Oceanus and indeed the whole world. Gaia thought everything was fine. Until one day …

Uranus had enough. And you might have too if your children ranged from several species, some one off creatures, all together numbering over fifty. Eventually he had enough of all these wild and unruly offspring, and decided to imprison the youngest of his children. And in no way was Uranus interested in any more booty calls with Gaia. No matter how much of that new drink called wine she gave him.

Gaia was not pleased that Uranus had imprisoned their children. Even more unsavoury was the fact that he imprisoned them in the bowels of the Earth. And we all know that Earth is another name for Gaia, and what he thought of as her bowels, she saw as her womb. No wonder this couple was in serious trouble.

Little did Uranus know that his son Cronus was just waiting to depose his father who was flush with power. When Gaia asked who was brave enough amongst her sons to castrate their father, it was only Cronus who had the balls to do so!

As Uranus’ testicles and blood hit the Earth many more children would emerge from his final fertile act. With one slice of a sickle, his job as master of the universe was down the toilet.

So the next time you see an image of Gaia with a sickle, just know the real reason why it’s there. And maybe we should all remember that Gaia is only going to put up with so much of our garbage.

What did you think of our latest vase and story? Let me know in the comments below. You can check out more raku pottery vases and their stories here.